The Trouble with Exes


One of the biggest trouble with ex-girlfriends is that if you want them back, they are very hard to win back, harder than it probably would be to just find a totally new girlfriend.

The problem is though, that sometimes you think that the ex is the right girl for you and so you really do want her back. If you are caught in this situation, although your first instinct may be to beg her to come back, that is generally accepted to be a bad move.

When you beg an ex to come back, although it may work initially, it is usually only as she feels sorry for you that she returns and later, when that feeling of pity disperses, she once again leaves you as she would have lost her respect for you.

Another common mistake that some men make when they are trying to win back their ex, is to threaten either themselves or the ex. This once again may win her back initially but she will soon leave you again as her feeling of fear goes.

What may seem like a more reasonable approach but has also been proven to be a mistake, is to remind her of the good times you once shared. This apparently, according to recent studies, also brings back to the girl some of the bad times you shared together, including the ones which made her leave you in the first place.

So if you really want to win your ex back, you will have to forget your first instincts and think of a new set of strategies. Any strategy that you do pick though, will probably include an apology of some sort, perhaps even or something you didn’t realize you had done in the first place.

A lack of romance in a relationship is often a cause for girlfriends to leave you and so if you think this may be case in your instance, it is time to get romantic.

To start with you can offer to take her for romantic dinner, somewhere where you dine by candle light and talk freely about what you both want in a private and romantic atmosphere. If that sounds too pricey, consider instead going to the country for a picnic for just the two of you.

There you will be able to take a walk and discuss the possibilities for your future together. As the romance will have to be kept up if you are to be successful, you may want to consider mentioning a weekend away together, perhaps to somewhere romantic, ideally somewhere like Paris which is romantic and appealing.

If it was only the romance which was missing, the girl should still have feelings for you and so, once the romance continues, the relationship should this time work. If however, she split with you because you were too intense, you may have to take things slowly, allowing her to take the lead and suggest where you go from here.